Qwijibo
That's 25 points. 20 puntos si estas jugango Scrabbalina Quesadilla. I just hope you didn't play off a blank. Oh wait,.....you did. I mean, seriously dude, who plays off a blank. I know what you were thinking, "What if there is never an opening with the right letter and the right amount of space?". Well, the truth is, there's always room for Qwijibo. In fact, there's always room for a lot of things. Despite all the changes and obstacles in our lives, two things remain constant:
a) Board Game Cheating, and
b) Peyton Manning's inability to win a Superbowl (i.e. Beat the trits in the playoffs)
Since most of you are already comfortable and willing to agree on at b), let's focus on a). For those who have not done their research, I will start with a little background on "The Board Game". If there are any Board Game studies majors in the room, this should be nothing new to you.
The original boardgame was developed by Richard P. Scrodiles (Scro-da-leez). The game, originally named "Forgive Me Brother", eventually evolved into it's modern day "Sorry Brother". This is not to be confused with the classic "Sorry". And, although similar in name, they have very few similarities.
For those who played "Forgive Me Brother", there were few rules. The theme of the game was to travel the world via boat, ransacking towns and villages, working towards world domination. As you might expect, the game was based upon the life of the ancient day pirate. However, in order to avoid lawsuits by the ISBS (International Society of Buckos and Scallywags), Scrodiles was forced to make subtle changes to his game. Instead of pirates, players were referred to as "Scrotum Scratchers". Towns and Villages were called "Chappys" and "Stations" (eventually "Chappy Beach Clubs" and "Gas Stations" in the modern version). And lastly, unlike authentic pirates, players competed in mini-games in order to woo extremely young women from within their crew.
During the game's debut in 1777 within the town of Menemsha, members of the public were given the opportunity to learn and play for free. The event, catered by Snakerley Catering, was a huge success, resulting in almost 10 full games of "Forgive Me Brother" being played. As a spectator of the event, Scrodiles noticed something that was commonly occuring amongst the "Scrotum Scratchers"; many of the players would take advantage of opponent's distractions to manipulate the game board. This tactic, which in modern day is labeled as cheating, was considered a remarkable skill. And, as there was no rule forbidding such action, no penalties were assessed for this activity. And so began the act of board game cheating...
Although there are people who frown upon such action in modern times, this tactic still exists for many. Ironically enough, without cheating, board games would not exist; it adds the flavor of excitement to the mix...Unless, of course, you're playing Fireball Island, where the excitement lies within whether or not the fireball will actually do its job and knock your opponent off the bridge. I mean, seriously, who designed that game? You save up that card for turns. Waiting, lukring upon your prey. And then, when the moment is right, you launch. FIREBALL! The room goes silent, except for the sound of the rolling silver ball.....and the sound of inevitability. Even though your player is on the other side of the board, and the ball is going the opposite direction, you still fear for your own safety. And, just as Mr. Smith said, it is inevitable.....the ball will, and does, come rolling back around, only to leave you, the attacker, with a broken heart...and a fallen soldier. Man down. Man down (BTW, it has been statistically proven that if you do not yell ZING, ZANG, ZANGERS, etc, your chance of success drops by 50%). When asked what you would done different, you'd probably say "Not launch the Fireball", or "Launch down a different stream". But, anyone who attened Bristol University knows the true answer. Scrodiles knows the true answer. Drew Bledsoe knows the true answer. How about: "Not hit your own dude with the Fireball". How? The answer is simple: Qwijibo
San Dimas High School Football Rules
a) Board Game Cheating, and
b) Peyton Manning's inability to win a Superbowl (i.e. Beat the trits in the playoffs)
Since most of you are already comfortable and willing to agree on at b), let's focus on a). For those who have not done their research, I will start with a little background on "The Board Game". If there are any Board Game studies majors in the room, this should be nothing new to you.
The original boardgame was developed by Richard P. Scrodiles (Scro-da-leez). The game, originally named "Forgive Me Brother", eventually evolved into it's modern day "Sorry Brother". This is not to be confused with the classic "Sorry". And, although similar in name, they have very few similarities.
For those who played "Forgive Me Brother", there were few rules. The theme of the game was to travel the world via boat, ransacking towns and villages, working towards world domination. As you might expect, the game was based upon the life of the ancient day pirate. However, in order to avoid lawsuits by the ISBS (International Society of Buckos and Scallywags), Scrodiles was forced to make subtle changes to his game. Instead of pirates, players were referred to as "Scrotum Scratchers". Towns and Villages were called "Chappys" and "Stations" (eventually "Chappy Beach Clubs" and "Gas Stations" in the modern version). And lastly, unlike authentic pirates, players competed in mini-games in order to woo extremely young women from within their crew.
During the game's debut in 1777 within the town of Menemsha, members of the public were given the opportunity to learn and play for free. The event, catered by Snakerley Catering, was a huge success, resulting in almost 10 full games of "Forgive Me Brother" being played. As a spectator of the event, Scrodiles noticed something that was commonly occuring amongst the "Scrotum Scratchers"; many of the players would take advantage of opponent's distractions to manipulate the game board. This tactic, which in modern day is labeled as cheating, was considered a remarkable skill. And, as there was no rule forbidding such action, no penalties were assessed for this activity. And so began the act of board game cheating...
Although there are people who frown upon such action in modern times, this tactic still exists for many. Ironically enough, without cheating, board games would not exist; it adds the flavor of excitement to the mix...Unless, of course, you're playing Fireball Island, where the excitement lies within whether or not the fireball will actually do its job and knock your opponent off the bridge. I mean, seriously, who designed that game? You save up that card for turns. Waiting, lukring upon your prey. And then, when the moment is right, you launch. FIREBALL! The room goes silent, except for the sound of the rolling silver ball.....and the sound of inevitability. Even though your player is on the other side of the board, and the ball is going the opposite direction, you still fear for your own safety. And, just as Mr. Smith said, it is inevitable.....the ball will, and does, come rolling back around, only to leave you, the attacker, with a broken heart...and a fallen soldier. Man down. Man down (BTW, it has been statistically proven that if you do not yell ZING, ZANG, ZANGERS, etc, your chance of success drops by 50%). When asked what you would done different, you'd probably say "Not launch the Fireball", or "Launch down a different stream". But, anyone who attened Bristol University knows the true answer. Scrodiles knows the true answer. Drew Bledsoe knows the true answer. How about: "Not hit your own dude with the Fireball". How? The answer is simple: Qwijibo
San Dimas High School Football Rules
posted by Esteve at
9:12 AM
2 Comments:
Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't ultimate team success in "Forgive Me Brother" contingent upon whether the one they called simply "The Duke" does not finish 248 of 249, besting the only "mentally and physically not as capable" competitor? Or is that a different game entirely?
By
Ben, at 11:19 PM
I believe it's spelled "qwijibo"
By
Bryan, at 6:42 PM
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